My House Beautiful

I love Sundays. It's the only day of the week when I sleep in.

When I finally decide to roll out of bed, I make French Toast or Pancakes for Eric and the kids. Then...I spend the rest of the day preparing for the week: doing laundry, planning out meals, grocery shopping, putting away coats, toys, shoes...or whatever didn't get put back in its proper spot due to the busyness of the last six days.

When it's all done, I guess you could say, Sunday is my day to hit the re-set button.

As I type: Dinner's done. Laundry's done. Kitchen's clean. Backpacks are organized. And even my own preparation for class is complete. I'm ready to start a new week.

But best of all, the last of the new family room furniture arrived yesterday. We're still waiting for speakers to complete the upgrade on the TV (which will require installation), but the room, in terms of furniture is finally complete.

It's the most awesome feeling at the end of a long day of organizing, cleaning and cooking, to have a comfortable AND BEAUTIFUL place to sit down and prop my feet up.

One Awesome a Day- Take Two

It's a rare occurence that I don't sleep well. Aside from my recent anxiety and concern for my kids settling into new schools, I normally sleep soundly--waking up feeling rested. However, last night was one of those nights...I tossed and turned, stared at the ceiling, and watched the clock turn over hour after hour. By the time the sun came up, the thought of facing the day made me feel frazzled.

Add fatigued and forgetful to frazzled, and it makes for a morning where I can't find a single thing I need or everything that I want is on a different floor of the house, forcing me to go up and down the stairs, or to go in and out of rooms. Despite the frantic pace and my frantic mood, I did manage to get both kids out the door with lunch and homework ON TIME.

It was when I was trying to do the same for myself, while running up the stairs in our front hall that I happened to catch a glimpse of the doe just outside the window, in the side yard, eating plants.

We see deer in our yard all the time. And we see them in the wetland (behind the house) daily. It's not that this sight is something new for me. But, seeing the doe so close to the window--so near my own life and routine AND looking right at me, as if she wanted to start a conversation... well, it was awesome!

I was concentrating on a few million thoughts when the doe first caught my eye. It only took a split second for our mutually stare to stop us both from our tasks. Maybe that's what made it so awesome--the curiosity that I felt from the eyes of the animal looking at me was so unique and heart-warming. Feeling frantic, frazzled, fatigued...it all drained from me as I stood on the stairs looking out the window, feeling nose to nose with this small doe.

One of the few million thoughts running through my head just seconds before, had to do with the One Awesome a Day idea. I was feeling as if the day was already off to a bad start and thinking I'd have a slim chance of seeing or doing something awesome when I'd had no sleep and didn't feel as if I had any of my ducks in a row for the day. But then there was this incredibly peaceful and grounding experience that appeared out of nowhere and could be described by no other word than, "Awesome!".

Normally, the deer in the wetland travel in packs--up to 12 at time go running through in the winter. Never do I see just ONE! And for that, I knew I wanted to get my camera. But, how could I look away from this incredible, and no doubt rare, connection to this one, lone doe in my yard? Stepping away from the window might mean that I'd come back to the scene that is most typical on this side of the house: just plants--no deer.

Obviously, I took the risk. And when I returned she was still there and still willing to look right at me, almost more curious about the camera and the flash than she was of me the first time. I got a mediocre image that doesn't come close to capturing the magic I felt.

But maybe, that's what experiencing something "Awesome!" is really about--not being able to adequately re-create the scene.

One last thing about my birthday...

In preparation for the two and half days I’ll be lounging by the pool at a beautiful resort (see The Phoenecian), I got my nails done: fingers and toes!!

A mani/pedi combo defines luxury for me. And even though the color and perfection of my nails will be do me no good this time next week (remember the hiking/camping portion of the trip?), I went for it. Plus, I had a birthday gift certificate from a very generous friend.

While I was relaxing with my feet in the bubbly pool of warm water, thanking my friend for knowing THIS was just what I needed AND thanking the universe for giving me a FRIEND who knows THIS is just what I needed, I realized that I wouldn’t be able to let my birthday go just yet.

Besides posting my toes, there are a few special things I want to pass along—acts of kindness towards me on my birthday that deserve a little shout out.

I want to remember Adrienne’s gifts: how she went around the house and collected things that I already own and wrapped them up. She said, “Sometimes it’s fun to see your old stuff as new stuff.” I like that she is so effortlessly profound about a bar of soap from Pier One circa 2007, a mini notebook (already noted on several pages), a painted frame she gave me last year for Mother’s Day AND my 42nd birthday, and a Ziploc of gummi bears.

But then there was the note that she gave me that reminded me how she’s also effortlessly kind. She wrote me a happy birthday greeting and then had HER WHOLE 3rd GRADE CLASS sign too.

I want to remember the “Adopt-a-Pilot” assignment that Andrew did earlier in the year that just happened, on my birthday, to show up in his school “mail” (his homework and other class assignments from the previous week). Andrew was asked to identify a person in his life that reminds him of airline pilot and why. He wrote about ME!! Yes, me, his mom. Why? He said I’m fearless. (Really? Me?) At first, I thought my 11 year old was plugging easy information into a boring and random question but his answer made me cry and feel proud of him (and me!).

Andrew wrote that I am fearless because of the small things that I do in my everyday life that make other people nervous—like talking in front of a class every day. He said that even though I am old (HA!!!) that I try things like rock climbing and canoeing even if I know that I won’t be good at them.

But he really got me when he wrote this: “She cried at a public reading of one of her essays. She cried in front of all these people and I thought she would be embarrassed. At bedtime she told me she was embarrassed but got over it because her crying was a true feeling. She told me that telling the truth is important. She always tells the truth and so most of all, that makes my mom fearless.”

I’m crying right now trying to finish this post. Isn’t that the most beautiful gift a mom could ever get? But there was more…

I want to remember that Robin called me—actually rang me up on my home phone (!!!) to say happy birthday. I sat in the living room talking and laughing like a teenager with a best friend. It was priceless and thoughtful and serendipitous all in one!

I want to remember that I got over 100 well wishes on Facebook. And I know that happens to lots of people of their birthdays too. But I especially loved the way my wall of messages listed out the names of friends past and present, from my childhood friends to students I had in class last semester. There’s a THIS IS YOUR LIFE feeling to seeing so many names and corresponding little pics, popping up in no particular order to say “Happy Birthday.” It made me feel popular and loved and more a part of the world than I feel on a regular old day.

A huge HUG and a huge THANK YOU to the entire universe for making the first day of my 43rd year SO AWESOME!!

And now, I promise, my birthday is over and I’ll move on.