Story of my life...

It seems as if I'm always doing this--standing in the kitchen, looking through a cookbook, trying to figure out what's for dinner.

My mom tells a similar story about the stress of the infamous question, "What's for dinner?" In some ways her telling of it is a boast that she not only worked 8-4, five days a week, but that she also cooked a full, homemade meal, worthy of sitting down at the dining room table, following every one of those long days at the office.

I think it was 1976 when she "went back to work"--the year that both my brother and I were in school all day, the family was low on cash, and my dad had a flexible enough schedule as a professor at a university that she could work full time even though we only had one car.

She rode with a friend who lived nearby. Each day, she was picked up at 7:30 am and dropped off at 4:30 pm. And according to my mom, each day, just as her high-heeled foot would extend from the open car door and touch the curb, my brother, sitting patiently on the cement front steps, would say, "Mom, what's for dinner?" She claims he looked pitiful and forlorn as if he hadn't eaten all day. He claims he hated broccoli and kidney beans and was merely ensuring he'd have a stress-free meal.

Which ever is true is no longer the point of the story. For me, as a working mom with school-aged kids, the story is more about how one woman "did it all". How she, exhausted after a full day of work outside the home, kicked off her heels, and went to work again in her own kitchen. It's about how one woman, despite the shifting cultural paradigms from the role of the stay-at-home/housewife to that of the working mom with the latchkey kids, successfully merged the two sets of values-- making it look easy and making it look as if every other mom was doing this, too.

There are times when I'm tired or when I just don't feel like cooking. There are times when I contemplate calling out for pizza, but because of my mom and all those hot meals, served promptly at 5:45pm, I think better of it and keep flipping the pages of my cookbook until I find the perfect thing for tonight.

Four days in a row... Awesome!

It's the wet and the dry--keeping them separate, folding one into the other... baking has never been something I'd say I'm good at. The "science" of baking doesn't mesh with the "creative" of cooking that I enjoy and so more often than not, my cookies turn out too hard or my cakes too dry.

And so isn't it Eric--the chemistry major and the guy with the most patience of anyone I know, who usually does the baking in the house? Yes, it is.

BUT... Today, I had it in my mind that I wanted to make banana bread or pumpking bread or spice bread... some kind of bread that I could gift to a family that just moved into the neighborhood. They'd invited us over for pizza and although I was already planning to take bakery purchased cut-out cookies as dessert, I wanted to take a home-made housewarming gift.

Maybe it was my sheer determination or maybe it was the care that I took in following the directions to the letter... My pumpkin bread turned out awesome, perfect, and delicious!

I made three mini-loaves--two for the new neighbors and one for Eric and me to taste BEFORE we gifted a home-made, never before made recipe to the neighbors.

Nervously, I cut a small piece from the small loaf. Then I wanted to jump for joy. The "look" of the inside of the bread was as dense as its suppossed to be without being too dry. And then, when the bread hit my tongue...SLAM DUNK. My bread had just the right amount of sweet to bread flavor and just the right amount of pumpkin goodness. I was overjoyed and even more proud when Eric, the household baker, thought I'd done a good job,too.

I wrapped the other two loaves in aluminum foil, tied a yellow ribbon around each package and felt proud to take a home-made, fall-flavored bread to my new friends. AWESOME!

This recipe came from the America's Test Kitchen Healthy Family Cookbook. Here it is:
Pumpkin Bread

1 15oz can of pumpkin (unsweetened)
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1 1/3 cup all purpose flour
2/3 cup whole wheat flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
4 tablespoons (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, melted and cooled
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1. Cook the pumpkin, sugar, cinnamon, salt, nutmeg, and ginger together in a medium saucepan over medium-high heat, stirring constantly, until thick and shiny, 5-7 minutes. Set aside to cool.

2. Adjust an oven rack to the middle position and heat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly coat an 8 1/2 by 4 1/2 inch loaf pan with vegetable oil spray.

3. Whisk the all-purpose flour, whole-wheat flour, baking soda, and baking powder together in a large bowl. In a separate bowl, whisk the cooled pumpkin mixture, melted butter, eggs, and vanilla together.

4. Gently fold the pumpkin mixture into the flour mixture with a rubber spatula until just combined (do not overmix). The batter will be very thick.

5. Scrape the batter into the prepared pan and smooth the top. Bake until golden brown and a toothpick is inserted into the center of the loaf comes out with just a few crumbs attached, 45-55 minutes, rotating hte pan halfway through baking.

**For my little loaf pans, cook time was 25 minutes.

All the pretty brides...

As it turns out, all the girls looked like brides. No traditional dresses in the house!! I guess traditions change. Or maybe I was just clueless all along.

Did I tell you that 155 kids took first communion today? Yes, 155. Of course, the group was broken up into three masses. There were two groups at 10--a Mass by Father Joe in English in the main sanctuary and a Spanish one done by Father Leo is the chapel. Then the Saint Paul School kids along with a handful of Religious Ed. kids went at Noon. That was us.

So, here's what Adrienne looked like:

Isn't she so cute? I did her hair on my own. I'm proud of that because I really can't even do my own hair. I don't know how to braid and I'm terrible with a blowdryer and hairbrush together. Like playing a video game, which I am not good at either, the hand-eye coordination necessary leaves my hair (or Adrienne's) all tangled up. But a bun, I can do. And thank god, Adrienne loves buns and has wanted them for the last few special occassions. So for now, I'm safe in the "pleasing Adrienne with hairstyling skills" department.

At the church, we were packed in the pews, but it wasn't uncomfortable. The service plus pictures after took two hours, but that wasn't a negative, either. Evidently, I was waiting for something to irritate me (not sure why) and it just didn't happen. How nice.

The pomp and circumstance of all the kids walking in was really the best part for me. It was fun to see my daughter and all her friends process into the church in their outfits with their hair fixed up in veils and tiaras and the boys with a gelled comb over.

My dad came to church which surprised me at first, but then after a few comments I wondered if he or my mom read the last post. I hadn't told them I was posting again nor given them the blog address, per say... but, dena out loud is a name I've used before... whatever. It was nice that they both went.

Eric's mother and sister and sister's child came too, although I am not sure if they came to the church or not. My parents encountered them in the driveway when the whole thing was over.

When I arrived home, I frantically threw together all the stuff I'd planned to cook: roasted potatoes (with olive oil, garlic, shallot, and fresh rosemary from my very own plant in the yard), salad (with yellow pepper, radish, tomato, and baby english cumcumber--kalamata olive, goat cheese, and asparagus absent-mindedly omitted because I felt rushed), and grilled chicken.

I say frantically only because I was putting pressure on myself. I'm working on being more laid-back--operating in the moment. But practice makes perfect on that one. And although I didn't feel stressed out, I worked quickly in an effort to get food on the table. In my rush, I didn't season everything as perfectly as I usually do (if I do say so myself). My opinion is that the meal was mediocre--not up to the normal standards around here.

Eric's mother didn't eat. Evidently she was fighting a cold and also grieving over the loss of her brother's wife who died from complications of Parkinson's Disease yesterday. Now, it's important for me to say that she didn't tell me any of this. She told Eric. In private. She stayed here at the house for about 30 minutes and then left. That seems crazy to me because it takes two and half hours for her to get here. Why she came in the first place is something I've been pondering for the last few hours, but that seems to be a "glass half empty" way of viewing thing. Maybe I should turn it around and feel touched by the fact that under the circumstances she DID MAKE IT and even if it was just for a bit, she made the effort. There. Glass is half full now.

Eric's mom did give Adrienne a card with $50 inside which was more than generous. From Adrienne's point of view, the glass is totally full!

Eric's sister and sister's child were fine. We covered the Lego tables with sheets. That seemed to mystify the kid and so he spent his time here out in the driveway on his Big Wheel (do they still call them that? those plastic tricycles with the plastic wheels?).

The sister/sister's child thing was over in about an hour. She also gave $50 in her card, too. I can't believe I'm even thinking about being a catty in-law about this stuff.

In was a drama-free day and besides Adrienne looking so beautiful, the hightlight of the day was our dessert. I had mini-cakes made with crosses of white chocolate on the top. See?

The cake was pefectly moist on the inside and the icing was a whipped cream that was also just the right amount of sweet vanilla. I would actually be willling to do the day all over again just to have another one of those cakes.