Gratitude and Relief

Earlier today, I thought for sure that Adrienne's gymnastics meet (intra squad event at the high school tonight) would surely be the "awesome" thing for today. And for that reason, I took two cameras, hoping to get a good shot of her.

But as great as Adrienne performed, Andrew went missing for three hours which totally overshadowed everything and made for a dramatic evening in a way I wasn't anticipating.

It was around 5:15pm when I received a text from him... He was at Saint Paul, his former school, visiting friends by attending a girls' volleyball game. The game had started and he'd already connected with the parent that had agreed to bring him home. His next text, a few minutes later, asked if he stay out after the game by going over to this friend's house. I said no. I asked him to text me when the game ended and then again when he got into the house (Eric was working and I was sitting in the stands at the gymnastics meet). No response.

Forty five minutes passed with no texts, no answering his cell phone or our house phone. And no response from the parent who agreed to drive him home. Initially, I wasn't worried. I thought he probably made it home and just forgot to let me know.

But when a Saint Paul parent arrived at the meet, having previously been at the Volleyball game, and did not recall seeing Andrew... well, I got worried. And when that same parent said Andrew's ride had gone to Pizza Hut with the team and Andrew for sure wasn't with them because she'd just come from there, I became stricken with panic. What had happened?

In the meantime, Eric finished his last patient and sent a text wondering if I was still at the gymnastics meet. I briefed him on Andrew's trip to the volleyball game, the break in communication, and the Saint Paul parent not recalling his attendance at the game or his presence at Pizza Hut. Eric drove home to check the house and drove to Saint Paul, all to no avail...No Andrew.

I felt sick, like the whole gym was spinning. It was possible Andrew's phone was dead and he couldn't call me or text me, but the information about Pizza Hut clouded the scenario. Why didn't he go with who he said he was going to go with? And if he did end up with another friend, why hadn't he made it home yet? The volleyball game had now been over for more than an hour now.

I pulled Adrienne from the meet and drove home to stategize with Eric about where to begin looking and to discuss at what point we call the police if we can't find him.

Most of the people Andrew mentioned would be at the volleyball game were girls. I didn't have any of those phone numbers on hand, other than the parent who agreed to drive him home and she still wasn't answering. As a result, I had to look for old school directories. Since we switched schools this year, all that information was moved to a drawer to make room for the current directories. I had a hard time finding what I needed. My hands shook, my focus divided between the task at hand and scenarios that might have come up at the game or after the game. I'd talked to the mom who agreed to bring him home. She didn't mention Pizza Hut at the time. My mind raced.

After two phone calls, I had no leads. Both calls were to houses that had a girl on the volleyball team last year, but not this year. Finally on my third call, I learned that Andrew did arrive at the gym and did leave with the parent he said he would leave with. And then one other phone call and I got this: The woman that agreed to drive Andrew is now divorced and her daughters were due to her ex-husband after the volleyball game.

Despite the fact that she told me over the phone that she would be happy to bring Andrew home, she took two of her daughters and Andrew to her ex-husband's house and then dropped her other daughter off at Pizza Hut. Why she didn't drop Andrew on her way to the ex-husband's house is puzzling (since we live right across the street from the school), but not surprising. I've had other oddball dealings with this same woman but thought that our close proximity to Saint Paul wouldn't possibly create the jaugernaut that she created tonight.

Then the doorbell rang. The ex-husband and Andrew stood in the shadows on the porch. Relief.

This probably reads as if there was just a lack of communication and a little misunderstaning. And in many ways that was true. However, there was also a time gap between when the volleyball game ended and when Andrew eventually showed up at the door that really had me envisioning CNN and CSI. Maybe I watch too many news shows, maybe I've become cyncial and distrustful of our society... But this situation was so unlike Andrew and so far fetched to create in my mind, that I couldn't help but think otherwise--worse things.

All the while Andrew was out of communication I couldn't stop thinking aobut how much he loves his phone!! He texts constantly!! He loves to call people to get or give the update. Not communicating was odd...

And so this was the downfall of our arrangement--so much texting and calling did land his phone into dead battery land. And he's just not old enough, not experienced enough, and not quite savy enough to know that when he was in limbo at the ex-husband's house, and finding that his phone was dead, that he should have asked to use the house phone.

One phone call is all it takes. He could have let me know what happened and I would have stayed at the meet, saved myself a double shot of adrenaline.

BUT... now he knows.

He saw the look on my face when I opened the door. It was 8:30pm--about the time he normally gets in the shower. From his eyes I could tell he didn't like what had happened either.

I felt relief and gratitude that he made it home. I also felt relief and gratitude that this happened now--in the sixth grade, and that it only took a few hours... hopefully, he'll file this away and remember to keep me posted next time. And if he doesn't... I'll be sure to remind him.